Life...

Sorry to all my friends who have been offended because of my bad mood today. Please don't keep in mind that it is because of the birthday card problem, it is just my own problem cause by accumulative stress from many sources - school, friends, family and mostly from my eldest brother... If there is any person who really felt offended, I would like to apologize, and also maybe I will need forever to overcome this...

Today's SR's birthday, on which I gave him a present. He wishes that everyone in 5S2 can still keep in contact after leaving the school. I would really want that to be happening, but is it possible? Just don't forget to call me up when you guys want a gathering).

Well then, everyone started to notice something is wrong with my mood. Don't worry, I'm okay... I am just suffering from some sort of pressure... Just stop bugging me and I should be fine in some time... Anyway, SC whether is it I envy SR that everyone is celebrating his birthday for him... Well, not actually because of that, even if I have that kind of jealous feeling... I am just facing with some stress.... Not jealousy...

I really do feel one thing, that is everyone in this world will (or most probably) cheat, bluf and criticise you behind your back, except one person, that's you yourself. I can say that am cheated many times, by almost everyone in this world and I'm starting to worry: "Is there really no one I can trust/rely on?", "Is there really no one that I can cry on his/her shoulder?". And then the conslusion is, yes, there is one - that's me... I am the one who will never cheat myself.

But maybe everyone will say that some of the thing they bluffed is just simply white lies only... However, we should know that not everything in this world can be considered as white lies.

And as the consequence of these stress - I will only trust myself in everything, I will only trust myself and no one else in many things starting from today, I won't be bothering about what you say behind me, and that means I will be shutting my diplomatic door until someone who can really open up my door again... Who can rebuild my trust toward the world...

Nobody in this world had becomed my companion, even if I have tried to ask for it......

P/S: I am planning to move this blog to another address for more secrecy, I 'll tell anyone whom I allow them to read my blog where will it be when the need arises... Don't ask me why...

And also please don't bothered with what I have said in this post, I just wanted to ....... relieve my stress ...... hopefully